


Bullet

by youxiaotu



Series: Dark!Zs. [1]
Category: NINE PERCENT (Band), 乐华七子NEXT | NEX7, 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Character Death, M/M, inspired by day6's music again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-07-16
Packaged: 2019-06-11 03:46:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15306810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youxiaotu/pseuds/youxiaotu
Summary: A bullet for a bullet.





	Bullet

**Author's Note:**

> No, this is no smut fic um, honestly this isn't a fic for the weak. Been wanting to write this for a while. Slightly inspired by Day6's Shoot Me Music Video but um, don't expect it to be exactly that. I was also listening to f(x)'s shadow while writing this so yeah, it affected the fic in a way. **implied stalking along with insanity and guns.**  
>  2k+ ; tell me if i missed anything or left anything hanging!

Why does it always end up with his heart filled with bullets of memories that he wouldn't want to relive? The look in his eyes etched deep in his mind, words he doesn't want to hear- he wouldn't want to hear- he refuses to hear. Why does it all always, always come back to him when he would would try throwing it away?

It plays again and again in his mind, the events of five minutes ago repeating, rewinding like it was an endless loop. _Stop, make it stop_. Tears slowly fills his eyes as he pleads for it all to stop, covering his face, screaming. _Please, please stop, I don't want to see! I don't want to remember it!_

_Please._

Zhu Zhengting's hideout is the abandoned building three blocks away from his home. A place no one dares to because of the rumours that surrounds it. Ranging from all kinds of stories that imply that someone died in it a long time ago, or that someone's in it, ready to take you. Little rumours that fills the place with even more sadness than it originally had and only Zhengting was its companion. Zhengting, who understands how it feels.

Zhou Yanchen is sunshine personified, and like sunshine, he also lit Zhengting up. Shooting him with his oh-so-bright smiles, making him at ease, tearing all the imaginary iron walls down that surrounds him and getting in before he could even recover from it.

He hates how he felt so strong with him when he was vulnerable,

Zhou Yanchen was anything but bad to him. Shooting him, filling him with nothing but sugar and flowery words, touching him with warmth and desire to protect him but why is it that it always, always ends up like this?

Like how Cai Xukun showered him with all the attention in the world. How he would always give him a smile when he doesn't do the same to everyone else, when he doesn't call them by a nickname, he is the only special person in Cai Xukun's world. Shooting him with praises, saying he's his favourite in this whole earth.

Like how Lin Yanjun said he's his muse, typing up proses about love and a character as pretty as him, saying there's no one as beautiful as he is, that no one can ever imitate him and look as perfect as he is, that he's flawless, that all the positive adjectives belong to him, all the beautiful things, all the beautiful thoughts, everything. Shooting him with poetic lyrics about him, as if he's worshipping him like he's made to do it, telling him that he's the main character in his life.

Like how Wang Ziyi filled his skin with flowers and butterflies, that all the pretty images relate to him, that his eyes are captivating ones he's ever seen, that his eyes sparkle, that his lips are sculpted perfectly, that he doesn't need more of that ink on his skin, the needles piercing him, filling him with many different images, many different stories, many different thoughts and wishes, shooting him with a beautiful smile, telling him he's the most precious artwork he's ever seen.

They're all liars.

Did they really see him that way? Were they telling the truth when they spoke? Were their looks all genuine? Were they all really people he could trust? Or were they only there to break him even more? Breaking his walls, taking advantage of everything about him, tearing him apart further and further until he's not himself anymore. Is that what they aimed to do?

Waiting for him to trust them, and throw him away after they got what they want? What is he to them? Why... Why did they do that to him?

 _Make it stop_... He begs, he pleas, he does it again and again. _Please, please stop._

Only this abandoned building is his friend. The only one that witnesses his laughter, his tears, his problems. The only thing that understands him.

 _Stop! I said stop!_ He yells, again and again, the next one louder than the previous. _Stop. Stop hurting me._

Maybe he was too trusting when he let Xukun into the building. He was too excited, pulling him along inside, wanting to tell him so many things about it, about how he once felt lonely and how this place accompanied him.

Maybe he was too blinded by Yanjun's words masked in beautiful synonyms. He wanted to show him the place that holds most meaning to him, the place that he wants the most important people in his life to see, the place that he would do anything to keep.

Maybe he was too captivated by the images that Ziyi drew on him. He wanted to show him the most beautiful scenery he's ever seen, the place that no matter how much myths, or rumours that fills it, was still very very beautiful in his eyes.

They never appreciated it. Isn't he someone precious to them?

Then why? Why don't they like the things he likes?

Then why? Why can't they accept the words he said that day?

Then- then why don't they... Why don't they accept him for his flaws?

Why did Xukun take his words back? Is he not his favourite anymore? Why did Yanjun tell him that he doesn't want him to be his muse anymore? Then why did Ziyi tell him he doesn't want to draw beautiful images on his skin anymore? Why did Yanchen stop smiling for him?

What did he do wrong? He'd do everything for them. Was it all fake? Was it all they wanted? To take his trust and step on him like he's some bug after? To make him smile just to hurt him?

He'd do anything, he'd fix it! He- he'll change! Please, please, please listen to him just once, he'll do anything, everything.

For his childhood friend and first love that's always been so proud of him,

For his author, the first man after his first love that saw the good- the beauty in him.

For the man who looked at him as if he's the most precious gem in the world, who made him feel more beautiful than he was.

He wants to bring them back. He misses them, he needs them.

He... He wants them back. He will have them back.

Shooting himself with more bullets of memories that pierced him deeply, he remembers everything so clearly, every second of it. Every word, every expression, everything.

 _I don't want it anymore. Stop, stop, stop, stopstopSTOP, please!_ Gripping his hair, screaming on top of his lungs.

All he did was love them. All he did was watch their every single move, listened to their every word, believed in them every breath they take. They were in sync, their laughter and tears, their happiness and their pain.

All he did was tell them that he loves them. But why did they have to do that to him? Why... Why did they have to break his heart? Shooting him with poisonous bullets, like they're asking him to die that moment after he speaks. Thoughts of getting rid of him in their lives masked by a polite smile. He knew it, they'd do it someday.

Zhou Yanchen isn't any different from them. Telling him he doesn't see Zhengting the same way after he treated him so well, as if they're lovers. Smiling apologetically, telling him he misinterpreted it.

No. He loved him, right? He was so sure of it, he knows. He sees him every day! He- he is with him every second of his life. He's Yanchen's other half.

Like how he was Xukun's.

Like how he was Yanjun's.

Like how he was Ziyi's.

Like... Like how he promised to never leave him- all of them promised. Why can't they keep promises? Why? Is he not enough? Not too pretty? Not too kind? Not too- not too perfect?

He did everything. Why can't they applaud him for his efforts and kiss him like it's the last day of their lives and hold him tight and never let go? Why can't they just tell him the truth, that they love him back? It wouldn't hurt if they did. He wouldn't have to have a hard time if they did. All they needed to do was to tell him they love him too.

Is... Is it that hard to tell the truth?

Liars, they loved him too, right? They did, they did! Zhengting knows, he's seen it, he's heard it! He asked them before and they said yes.

But... But why did they...

No. No. They... They hated him...

_You guys already told me that you love me. Am I that hard to love? What- what did I lack in?_

His hold on the suppressor gun loosens up as he looks at the lifeless body in front of him.

It takes him a few seconds before he regains energy to stand up, tracing up the dead body's outline with tape before he carries the body into one of the empty drums, covering it with a piece of wood- he'll take care of that later.

Bi Wenjun, written messily with a marker, a book drawn beside his name. _You overlapped with Yanchen._ Zhengting says, fondly touching the yellow-painted figure right beside the tape. He smiles so brightly. _Soon, you'll become like him too. It would've been prettier if you all smiled, then I could have taken one last picture with you._

For the man whom he loved truly, who made him feel even more special than he was.

For the man that listened to him, who made him feel like his voice is worth listening to.

Wenjun could have been different. Shooting his heart with bullets with a mix of everything the previous men gave him. He was Wenjun's favourite person, Wenjun's canvas, Wenjun making him his artwork, Wenjun's brightest smile.

They were one. They were each other's. Zhengting was sure of that.

He made sure to follow him everyday, be like Wenjun's shadow, watching his every day unfold, smiling when he smiles, crying when he cries, angry when he sees Wenjun with someone else.

He took them all out this time, why did it still end up the same way as the others?

But why is it... Why do they all do the same?

Light blue paint for the smartest boy. Light blue paint for the greatest liar. Light blue paint for the most polite smile. Light blue paint for the most polite denial.

He takes a glance at the cemented drums on the corner of the rooftop, One, two, three, four... five. Pink, Purple, Black, Yellow... Blue.

_Stop... Stop hurting me. Stop making me remember. Stop... I just wanted you to love me... You never loved me._

They never loved him.

No, no. He knows everything. He- they know everything! He's not crazy. Only in love. And- and they love him back, right?

He's Xukun's favourite, Yanjun's muse, Ziyi's canvas, Yanchen's brightest smile, Wenjun's everything.

They shot him with bullets of different colours only to shoot him with poisonous bullets. Zhengting could only fight back with real bullets.

That's- that's reasonable, right? He doesn't know how they do that, and so he does it with the only thing he knows how to do. A bullet for a bullet. No matter what happens in the end, he responds with a bullet that pierces their bodies for each bullet that pierces his heart.

There was nothing wrong with that.

Right.

One part bleach to nine parts water to clean everything up.

 _I love you all. So much._ Zhengting whispers as he runs his hand on the coloured figures on the floor. 

He picks the paper that flew in front of him, reading it out loud, **Missing: Zhu Zhengting, if seen, please contact Kaoshiung City Asylum or Police Department.** He laughs, remembering how he was locked in, how he suffered each and every day. They can't lock him up for being loved. They will never find him again, never.

And they will never find them. He laughs louder, looking at the wall he filled with papers. Missing people. Four faces all too familiar to him.

A loud screech suddenly fills his ears. There it goes again, covering his ears, he screams. _Stop! Stop hurting me. I don't want it, pleasepleaseplease. I don't want to remember. No, stop. I beg you. As loud as he can, Make it stop!_

The rain falls hard.

 _Stop_... His voice was weak. Legs feeling like jelly, Zhengting slowly falls onto the floor. _Yanchen, stop. Xukun, Ziyi, Yanjun. Stop shooting me. Stop. Stop! I said stop!_ Pulling his hair hard, frustrated tears rolling down his cheeks, he yells on top of his lungs once again. _Listen to me, I just wanted you to tell the truth. I... I didn't mean it. I didn't..._

Only this abandoned building understands Zhengting the best.

Ziyi's last words ring in his head.

_You're a monster, Zhengting._

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, this concept has been in my mind even before day6's shoot me was released, but yeah, that triggered my f'd up imagination. at least i didn't kill someone in a brutal way this time,, ahhahhah,,,
> 
> Thanks for @zhengchenism and @zhuzhting who encouraged me writing this plot, it took me a while to finish this (this was drafted before moon and august were even thought into existence uM)  
> aND FOR chris!!! again i am so sorry for putting u into all the painful reading skldfj ily!! <3
> 
> my inactive twt acc bc im a studying child: @bunnyzhangjing
> 
> edit: im a fool  
> edit pt. 2: yes this is me ares henghenghahee unu!!


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